TSTSGTBTGD
by Old Grasper Inc
Summary: Oh dear. Another attempt by the Fangirls that brought you Randomness. Er...AU? Maybe?


T.S.T.S.G.T.B.T.G.D.  
  
or 'The Story That Starts Good Then Begins To Go Downhill'  
  
By Old Grasper Incorporated and Friends  
  
Gary woke up from his dream. It had been a very strange dream. He couldn't quite remember what it was about, but he knew it had something to do with his best friend, Ash. He got up and put his school uniform on. He rushed downstairs and shovelled his breakfast into his mouth. He shouted a quick 'Bye!' to his mother as he ran out of the front door.  
  
He rushed to the end of the road to meet with Ash.  
  
"Hey," he said as he caught up with his friend.  
  
"Hey, Gary," replied Ash. "You coming to football practice tonight?"  
  
"Nah. Thought I'd skip it."  
  
"Oh." Ash seemed more disappointed than Gary expected.  
  
"Thought I'd ask Misty out. What d'ya think?"  
  
"I dunno. Maybe you should leave it. I saw her talking to that Stuart Anderson."  
  
"You gotta be kidding me, Misty's not his type. For a start, she's female."  
  
"What have you got against Stuart? Since when were you such a homophobe?"  
  
"OK, OK, sorry. What are you getting so worked up about? Since when were you such great mates with Stuart?"  
  
"I'm not. It's just. Oh, forget it, I'm going." Ash left Gary to travel alone. Gary wondered what was wrong with Ash but then he decided that his date with Misty was much more important.  
  
When Gary came through the school gates, Ash looked up at Gary in anticipation. He expected Gary to come over and apologise. Of course, he would forgive him. Gary began walking towards him. Ash looked at him and was about to say 'Alright, I forgive you,' but Gary walked right past him. Ash turned around and saw Gary walk over to Misty. He watched as Gary asked Misty out. She giggled and Ash could tell she said 'yes'. He looked down in pain, as a hedgehog was humping his foot. . . Fine, so there wasn't actually a hedgehog humping his foot, but it would've been funnier if there were. He sighed, rejected, and it started to rain. Poor Ash. He watched through his wet hair in front of his eyes as Gary and Misty walked off together, hand in hand.  
  
* * *  
  
The next day, Ash was walking slowly to school. He didn't want to talk to Gary, as he'd probably just talk about his date. When he finally got to school, he was surprised to see Gary sitting on his own.  
  
"What's wrong?" he said going over to Gary.  
  
"Misty wasn't who I thought she was. One word; slut."  
  
Ash sat beside him and put his arm around Gary's shoulders.  
  
"I'm sure she wasn't right for you anyway."  
  
BUT! Misty had heard! She was devastated. She ran to the local gun shop and stole the biggest, evillest, painful looking gun they had. Then . SHE SHOT HERSELF!!!!!!!!  
  
Some random bloke ran over (interrupting any romantic scene which may have occurred between Ash and Gary) and shouted "OH MY GOD! Misty's dead!" Then he fainted.  
  
"Wasn't that Mickey?" said someone. Ash was a bit sad but couldn't help thinking 'heh heh, now the competition's out of the way!'  
  
Gary was stunned. He sat in silence for a while then ran off wailing "Nobody loves me!" This was his chance. Ash got up an said "I-" but Mickey was up, stumbling around, shouting "She's dead, damn it, DEAD!"  
  
Ash cursed the large eared fool then ran after Gary, who was sitting under the old chestnut tree.  
  
"Noooooooooo, Gary, I l-"  
  
"She's deeeeeaaaaad," shouted Mickey. Ash picked up a chestnut and threw it at him.  
  
"FECK OFF, Y'DAMN FOOL!" he shouted. Ash grabbed Gary's shoulders and said, "Damn it! I've gotta say this once and for all! Gary Oak, I lo-"  
  
Suddenly Ash was engulfed by millions of African children. They were followed by an insane girl shouting "Registered Charity number threeeeee!"  
  
"GAH!" cried Ash. He tried again. "I lo-" but sadly, a rain of chestnuts fell upon their heads at that moment. When they stopped Ash shouted as loud as he could  
  
" I LOVE YOU!!!!!!" But Gary had been knocked unconscious by the evil chestnuts of doom.  
  
He woke up and said "Did you say something?"  
  
Suddenly, Ash broke into song.  
  
"I wanna tell you what I'm feeling, but I don't know how to start, I wanna tell you but now I'm afraid that you might break my heart, oh why should anything so easy, ever be so hard to do? I wanna tell you what I'm feeling and to say that, I l-"  
  
A big noise filled the whole field. Everybody was clapping Ash because he was such a great singer. But Ash was less than pleased.  
  
"PISS OFF, YOU NERKS!" he cried.  
  
"What's up with you?" said Gary, annoyed.  
  
"Huh?" said Ash.  
  
"You're just getting mean now. I don't wanna be friends with you anymore!" said Gary.  
  
"FINE, YOU BASTARD! THROW MY LOVE AWAY! YOUR SEXY GOOD LOOKS NEVER ATTRACTED ME! IT WAS ALL THE POTATO SACK'S FAULT!"  
  
Gary was shocked (again).  
  
"Y-You love me and my potato sack?"  
  
"Well, mainly you, but yes, you are my one true looooooove!"  
  
"Oh, Ash! I only just realised it this second but I think I love you too. I mean," Gary was looking embarrassed. "You're a jolly nice boy, Ash, we're going to have a spiffing time together." Gary grabbed a top hat and cane and took Ash's hand and sang:  
  
"Let's fly, let's fly away! Tally ho! Hey ho, hurrah! Jolly hockey sticks and all that, old bean!"  
  
They pranced off together gaily into the sunset. Aahhh.  
  
The end.  
  
(Rather jolly, don't you think?) 


End file.
